• The thought that Brucie Wayne and Batman being two completely separate entities that Bruce can code switch between has consumed me especially with the idea that he mixes the two together on occasion to fuck with people

    ~~~~~~~~~

    *Batman and Superman searching a dressing room*

    Superman: What about this thing, it looks suspicious?

    Batman *full Batman voice*: That’s an eyelash curler darling

    ~~~~~~~~

    *OG JLA revealing identities to newbies*

    Green Arrow: Your turn Bats, who are you?

    Batman having decided to fuck with him walking up to him cocking his hip putting one hand on his chest and in full Brucie Wayne mode: C’mon Ollie-Dollie you know who I am. We dated 💕

    Green Arrow (internally): Modem noise

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Recently revealed identities with Clark and Brucie being at the same party

    Brucie: oh howdy 🤠 cowboy, fancy meeting you at this shindig

    Clark *flustered* (internally): he can’t be Batman he can’t be Batman he can’t be Batman…

    ~~~~~~~~~

    *Bruce getting a call during a JLA meeting*

    Brucie: Oh! hello dear, yes of course I’m coming to your party I’ll see you later 😘

    Batman: Our security measures need to be increased due to the number of criminals currently attempting to follow heroes to their base of operations

    JLA *experiencing whiplash*: what.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    *undercover Brucie and members of the JLA at a party*

    Bruce *pretending to be drunk wandering over to the flash*: excuse moi but can I get your attention for just a momento😊

    Flash *completely disconnecting Bruce and bats*: yeah uh sure sir are you alright

    Batman *quiet but deep Batman voice*: there’s an assassin in the rafters

  • So I was once actually collecting data in a frozen river, and another guy fell in, filled up his waders and everything. He was wearing cotton (we were floored), and I had the car keys so I was like “alright, I’ll walk you back to the car to make sure you’re okay. Then you can strip down in there and get the heat going. There’s a blanket to wrap up in.” And he looked at me like I was insane. He said, “what? I’m fine.” I informed him that actually, if he stayed outside in subzero temperatures, soaking wet, in cotton, he was Licherly going to Freeze To Death, and he was like, “it’s not the 1800s lmao.”

    And then while the guy in charge Forced him to go back to the car and strip, I had to stand there in a frozen river absolutely bewildered by the implication that a Wildife Biologist thought hypothermia is like, an old timey disease that people stopped getting at some point.

  • WHAT DOES HE KNOW THAT WE DONT

  • Vampire spending his current life as a wildlife biologist almost blows his cover when he forgets that humans often perish from Cold and Wet Syndrome.

  • can you imagine how freaky shark mermaids would be like unlike sharks, shark mermaids would have actual arms/hands and could rely on touching things with their hands to see if they’re prey rather than having to bite like sharks do. like youre just swimming in the ocean and suddenly you feel a strong grip on your leg, you freak the FUCK out because uh what????? the fuck??? youre swimming alone in the ocean??

    a head pops out of the water, dorsal fin pointed from its back and it just points at you and says in a low whisper: “i thought you were a seal. please dont swim alone like this, im sorry i scared you i just wanted to see what you are” and then disappears back into the depth. what the fuck.

  • no come back ma’am

  • *under my breath* underwater girlfriend

  • underwater wife

  • Underwater love of my underwater life

  • hate how they forced bugs bunny into anti-weed propaganda in the 90s, as if bugs bunny wouldn’t love smoking weed 

  • To be perfectly fair, bugs bunny would also love taking money for starring in anti-weed propaganda and then using said money to buy weed

  • OH HELL YEAH!
    OH FUCK YEAH!

    This is what I'm talking about!

    Look at this handsome SOB! I love him, you love him! He's the first AU, he forged the way so that others like Ink could follow!

    AND!

    If he beats Ink in this match, very good chance he's making it to the final round!

    SEND OUR BOY TO THE TOP!

  • being a horror fan that experiences panic inducing paranoia fucking sucks like ill just be like wow i cant wait to go watch scary shadow creature video number 74 and then spend the rest of the night clutching my phone with the flashlight on and playing five nights at freddys 4 in real life

  • like im aware that watching horror stuff at like 3am is going to make me think that slenderman is in my kitchen but also im a dumb bitch who sees scary video thinks yay i love scary video :) and immediately watches it

  • Fascinated by what the draws you people to horror content

  • i like when theres some kind of creature or perhaps a guy

  • &.